Genshin Impact: My roommate and I became funny Hilichurls

Page 108

There are many versions, but the two most mainstream ones are:

First, the ruthless and cold-blooded Supreme Squirrel shows an inexplicable doting affection only towards the young Lady Narcida, and their relationship remains a mystery.

Second, Lord Flying Squirrel and Lord Great Compassion Tree King have a close relationship and often "discuss matters alone" in the Pure Goodness Palace.

Some audacious historians, based on Nasita's immediate plea to the Supreme Being after her escape and the Supreme Being's extraordinary concern for the two grass gods, have even proposed a shocking conjecture—

Lady Nasita, or perhaps the Supreme Being and the Great Tree King...

Of course, the flying squirrel himself was unaware of these rumors.

Even if he knew, he would probably only feel a skull-like headache and consider whether to play the role of a "rumor buster" and "visit" those overly imaginative scholars door-to-door.

After all, he was just an ordinary former office worker (now a dead ruler) who wanted to properly assist (and protect) the two grass gods while trying to avoid getting involved in trouble.

Chapter 130 Another chaotic day

"Momonga! We've come to see you! How's life been in Sumeru?"

Before Qingyu arrived, his voice preceded him. With the characteristic loud and boisterous manner of the four-person group, he kicked open the ornate wooden door of the Jingshan Palace council hall with practiced ease, a bright (and irritating) smile on his face.

However, the smile beneath his mask froze the moment he saw the scene inside, his eyes widening as if he had witnessed something that could overturn the fundamental laws of Teyvat—

The gentle and wise Great Tree King Buyer was now lying on the flying squirrel's skeleton in an extremely undignified, octopus-like posture!

Meanwhile, Ainz Ooal Gown, the supreme being, was trying to pry the "koala" clinging to him with his cold, bony hands. But the Great Tree King seemed determined to stay on him, his hands gripping the collar of Ainz Ooal Gown's magnificent mage robe tightly. The two were locked in a tangled mess, and the scene was quite chaotic and... suggestive.

Qingyu's brain went blank for three seconds, and then he made what he considered to be a very pragmatic decision.

He silently and gently closed the door that he had just kicked open.

It was as if nothing had been seen or happened.

"Wait! Qingyu! It's not what you think!!!"

From inside the door came the furious, even terrified roar of a flying squirrel; the skeleton's jaw was practically dislocated.

Just then, Nasita, carrying a thick fairy tale book, walked over from the other end of the corridor. Looking at Qingyu, who was frozen at the doorway, exuding an aura of "I saw something I shouldn't have seen," she tilted her head, her pure eyes filled with doubt: "Qingyu? Why aren't you going in? What happened?"

Qingyu didn't answer Naxida directly. Instead, he turned around abruptly and said to Ying, Paimon, Zhang Chu, Erkang, and Gu Qian, who had just walked over, with a shocked tone as if he had discovered a new continent: "Do you... remember that explosive anecdote we heard in the Sumeru City tavern about the flying squirrel and the Great Tree King?"

Ying immediately recalled, her expression becoming somewhat subtle: "You mean... that outrageous rumor that Ainz and the Great Tree King have a close relationship, even... uh... that kind of thing?"

Qingyu nodded vigorously, his expression beneath the mask extremely serious.

"But now it seems that it might not be unofficial history..."

Zhang Chu crossed his arms and calmly (and sarcasticly) retorted, "Please, that rumor is so outlandish it's practically just 'history,' even the mad scholars of the Order of the Church wouldn't believe it, okay?"

Qingyu was resolute.

"Based on the 'firsthand information' I just witnessed, I dare say that this will soon be upgraded from unofficial history to official history! And it will be the kind with illustrations and on-site reconstructions!"

The expressions on everyone's faces instantly became incredibly varied, a mixture of gossip, shock, and excitement at the sheer scale of the event.

"Holy crap! I have to witness this historic moment with my own eyes!"

Erkang's gossip spirit ignited instantly. He shoved aside Qingyu, who was still blocking the doorway and trying to organize his thoughts, gathered his energy in his dantian, and kicked the poor carved wooden door again with even more force than Qingyu had used!

"Hey! You two inside! I heard you're getting married soon?! Where are you? Come out and receive our blessings!"

Er Kang roared loudly as he stormed into the room.

However, the room was empty; the two people embracing as one had imagined were not there. Only a gentle breeze blew through the window, stirring the light gauze curtains.

"Huh? Where did they go? Did they hide?"

Er Kang scratched his head, looking confused.

Just then, the door he had kicked so hard it was teetering on the brink of collapse, due to inertia, slowly and creaked back, half-open and half-closed, revealing the scene behind it—

The flying squirrel and the Great Tree King were like two reliefs forcibly embedded in the wall, one on the left and one on the right, tightly "imprinted" into the hard wall in an extremely distorted posture!

The flying squirrel's head was tilted to one side, and the red light in the skull's eye sockets dimmed a bit;

The Great Tree King's beautiful hair and clothes were now disheveled, and his face still showed signs of shock.

Clearly, the shockwave from Er Kang's earth-shattering kick just now directly slammed the two people who were trying to separate into the wall!

As the door was fully closed, the two people, having lost their support, fell straight down from the wall like two bags of cement, crashing onto the floor with a dull thud, and remained motionless, like two quiet "corpses."

Er Kang looked at the "results" on the ground and awkwardly scratched the back of his head: "Uh... I think... I used a little too much force..."

Just then, a "thump" sound came from behind, like a heavy bundle falling to the ground.

Everyone turned around and saw Al Heissen, who had just walked to the door carrying a large stack of documents, frozen in place, with the bundle of documents, which was as high as a small mountain, scattered all over the ground.

His usually expressionless handsome face now showed a rare crack, his eyes were empty, as if he had seen the end of the world.

“...What you just said…”

Al-Hysen's voice was as dry as sandpaper.

"Supreme Lord Flying Squirrel and Lord Great Kindness Tree King...are they unconscious?"

The group exchanged glances. Although the process was a bit outrageous, the result seemed to be correct, so they all nodded in unison.

El-Heinz remained silent.

Silently and mechanically, he pulled a large glass bottle from inside his scholar's robe, filled with colorful pills—

Those were potent sleeping pills specially made for him by Tinari to force him to rest after working 72 consecutive hours of overtime. The bottle was labeled "Extremely Dangerous! One pill at most!"

Then, under everyone's horrified gaze, Al-Hysen uncorked the bottle, tilted his head back, and, as if eating candy, gulped down the entire bottle, containing at least a hundred sleeping pills!

He didn't even take it with water; he just swallowed it whole!

The next second, Al-Hysen's eyes rolled back, and he fell straight backward, crashing heavily onto the scattered pile of documents, joining the ranks of the "comatose".

Inside the Jingshan Palace, there was a deathly silence.

"Holy crap!!! Elhesen committed suicide!!!"

Gu Qian was the first to let out a heart-wrenching scream.

"No way! What kind of work has driven him to this point?! He actually swallowed a whole bottle of sleeping pills in one go!"

Ying was so frightened that her face turned pale.

"Gastric lavage! We must lavage his stomach immediately! Otherwise, he'll really be gone!"

Zhang Chu remained calm and immediately made a judgment.

"Let me do it! I know how to do it!"

Er Kang volunteered and pulled out an extremely thick rubber tube that looked like it was for camels and a funnel from somewhere.

"Erkang, where the hell are you going to stick the tube?! That's the nose! Not the mouth! And this is for Hilichurls, isn't it?!"

Qingyu was terrified when he saw Erkang trying to shove a thick tube into Elhesen's nostril.

"Oh well, it's practically the same hole anyway! Don't worry about the details! Get ready to fill it with water! Let's start the rescue!"

Er Kang was flustered and completely disregarded the feelings of the victim.

"Stop! You bunch of idiots! Do you want to kill him?!"

The flying squirrel, which had just gotten up from the ground, was so frightened by the horrific "rescue" scene that the red light in its eyes almost went out. Forgetting about its broken bones, it quickly tried to stop it.

Nasita stared at the utterly chaotic scene before her—two gods embedded in the wall (who had just fallen), a scribe foaming at the mouth, and honor knights performing a horrific "medical treatment"—her little head filled with immense confusion and helplessness.

Thus, the originally planned peaceful and tranquil visit to Sumeru turned into a chaotic mess due to a shocking misunderstanding, a physical coma, and an extremely unprofessional rescue operation.

Today's theme at Jingshan Palace is destined to be devoid of "wisdom" and "tranquility," leaving only "chaos" and "noise."

Chapter 131 A Thousand Stars Journey

What should we do next?

Qingyu lay sprawled out on the grass of Sumeru, like a wilted wind slime, so bored it was about to sprout mushrooms.

"How about we hold another concert?"

Er Kang casually pulled out a sparkling guitar studded with rhinestones out of thin air, excitedly suggesting it, his fingers haphazardly strumming a string of ear-piercing noises.

"No! Put away your weapon of mental pollution!"

Zhang Chu covered his ears, his face filled with unbearable pain.

"After the last concert, the higher-ups at Sumeru unanimously passed a resolution banning us from engaging in any form of performance! Our current standing in the music industry is even lower than the credibility of Winterfell in Liyue!"

"Alas...how tragic...true friends are hard to find, and highbrow art is appreciated by few..."

Er Kang threw down his guitar, looked up at the sky at a 45-degree angle, and tried to squeeze out two sad tears.

The abandoned guitar traced a bright parabola through the air, striking several cats that were dozing nearby with pinpoint accuracy.

"Meow-!"

With a few piercing howls, the cats bristled and scattered in all directions.

"Erkang! Why should a cat bear the cost of your sorrow!"

Gu Qian couldn't stand it anymore. He tried to soothe the frightened cats with his massive Thunder King body, but he almost stepped on one of their tails, which scared the cats so much that they ran away even faster.

"or……"

Gu Qian then pulled out his custom-made phone with a screen even larger than Paimon's, clumsily tapped a few times, and brought up an interface that twinkled with countless stars, which he then showed to everyone.

"Play this? The latest expansion for Thousand Star Chronicles, 'Elemental Wars: Ultimate Mix and Match'?"

"what is this?"

Ying curiously leaned over, and Paimon floated beside her, his little head almost disappearing into the screen.

"A Thousand Stars Travel?"

Qingyu sat up with a jolt and touched his chin.

"you sure?"

"Absolutely certain, absolutely certain, and without a doubt!"

Gu Qian nodded honestly.